Nothing is happening here, nope :

Lighting up your night :

Ladies love a man in uniform :

The fingermonster compels you :

Your birthday wish come true :

The most out of your 37.5 cubic feet :

A paragon of organizational skill :

Your head will explode :

It'll set your face on fire :

All the evil you know and expect :

Safety first! :

More colorful than your average mehtank :

The best defense is a slappy offense :

You will not leave :

More colorful than your average .com :

Abandon maturity all ye who enter :

We are watching you :

Levitationally enhanced :

We have a monkey :